Forgive me a sinner.
It's absolutely amazing to me how my girls can go from angels to demons in a matter of moments, but then this is not unlike myself when denied my own way. I often talk with my daughters about selfishness and the "I wants". I reference the little girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as an example of the "I wants" and how the little girl is a "bad nut".
Last night a great battle of wills took place in the forest of Pixley (our street). An angel (my daughter) decided that she wanted her way. The fight was short and I of course prevailed. The angel sat weeping in the other room while I let the consequences of her actions take root. I proceeded with the bedtime routine as usual and brought her back in when it was appropriate. In a short while both angels were asleep and I went back downstairs to finish up, relax, etc.
As with most "growing opportunities", I tried to contemplate the evening as I was winding down; thinking through my thoughts, words, and actions. There was nothing out of the ordinary regarding this battle and after some tea and the last half of a movie my wife and I turned in.
In the early morning hours I got up and prepared for work. As I was packing up my gear I noticed a little piece of paper stuffed into the same pocket my wallet goes in. I plucked the paper up and noticed some writing carefully inscribed on it. After moving into some light the word "ZOE :)" appeared in yellow highlighter.
This doesn't happen all the time, but when it does it's truly a blessing. The little note was perfectly placed, not only physically, but timely. I needed that little bit of encouragement to reassure me that I did the right thing.
Thank God for little notes.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Reflections - On being a father
Forgive me a sinner...
A young man and his family stood praying in the back of a church awaiting the glorious Great Entrance. The man, full of zeal for his new found faith, attempting to church his children, signs himself with the sign of The Cross in an effort to stay with the Liturgy. His wife obviously uncomfortable and unsure of this new experience, stares on trying to make sence of it all.
"May the Lord God remember all of you in His Kingdom, now and ever and unto ages of ages.", the deacon calls. As the procession nears the young man struggles with his children, "get up!" he says with a forced whisper, "stand up!" gritting his teeth. One last effort to force his children to stand aright, he yanks on their arms. The procession passes as it has done for the last 2000+ years. The clergy and people praying for the salvation of the world.
The family is the Domestic Church and all that we do should mirror Christ to the world. It starts in our homes, behind closed doors long before we arrive to participate in the Liturgy.
I recall fighting with my wife, because we were late for church. Angry with one another the entire 20 minute drive and leaving her in the car as I marched in all my "righteous" anger to go stand before the Creator of the universe, the I AM.
Jesus Christ has never forced anyone to follow Him, nor has he "yanked" them by the arm to stand them up in reverance as He passes by. The example of our Lord and Saviour should show us that churching our children is a marathon of peaceful continual correction, not a sprint to turn our kids into monks/nuns, or to appear pious before others.
There was a statement told to me quite frequently when I was first introduced to Christ. "You may be the only bible people ever read." I thought this statement to be somewhat silly at first, but after having children I understand it's meaning more than ever. I am the "Priest" of my household. I "read" the gospel around the clock to my family, not verbally, but by living it out, not by forcing them to stand and pray. I like a deacon, direct my family's attention to help keep them on track. This is my calling as a Christian, as a husband, and as a father.
May God grant me humility, love and patience to fulfill that which he has entrusted to me.
A young man and his family stood praying in the back of a church awaiting the glorious Great Entrance. The man, full of zeal for his new found faith, attempting to church his children, signs himself with the sign of The Cross in an effort to stay with the Liturgy. His wife obviously uncomfortable and unsure of this new experience, stares on trying to make sence of it all.
"May the Lord God remember all of you in His Kingdom, now and ever and unto ages of ages.", the deacon calls. As the procession nears the young man struggles with his children, "get up!" he says with a forced whisper, "stand up!" gritting his teeth. One last effort to force his children to stand aright, he yanks on their arms. The procession passes as it has done for the last 2000+ years. The clergy and people praying for the salvation of the world.
The family is the Domestic Church and all that we do should mirror Christ to the world. It starts in our homes, behind closed doors long before we arrive to participate in the Liturgy.
I recall fighting with my wife, because we were late for church. Angry with one another the entire 20 minute drive and leaving her in the car as I marched in all my "righteous" anger to go stand before the Creator of the universe, the I AM.
Jesus Christ has never forced anyone to follow Him, nor has he "yanked" them by the arm to stand them up in reverance as He passes by. The example of our Lord and Saviour should show us that churching our children is a marathon of peaceful continual correction, not a sprint to turn our kids into monks/nuns, or to appear pious before others.
There was a statement told to me quite frequently when I was first introduced to Christ. "You may be the only bible people ever read." I thought this statement to be somewhat silly at first, but after having children I understand it's meaning more than ever. I am the "Priest" of my household. I "read" the gospel around the clock to my family, not verbally, but by living it out, not by forcing them to stand and pray. I like a deacon, direct my family's attention to help keep them on track. This is my calling as a Christian, as a husband, and as a father.
May God grant me humility, love and patience to fulfill that which he has entrusted to me.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Christ Ascended So We May Ascend
Forgive me a sinner...
This is an old post and decided to post it finally.
During liturgy today, while praying the kneeling prayers of Pentecost. This seemingly simple, but profound thought popped into my head. Christ did indeed ascend that we ourselves may ascend! Glory to God!
This is an old post and decided to post it finally.
During liturgy today, while praying the kneeling prayers of Pentecost. This seemingly simple, but profound thought popped into my head. Christ did indeed ascend that we ourselves may ascend! Glory to God!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
You know it's Lent when...
... Your 5 year old goes to confession for the first time.
(just had to get this down in case I forgot)
(just had to get this down in case I forgot)
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Moving on up...
Glory to God for all and in all things!
I realize it's been a few since my last post, but I have a good excuse! We've moved! Yes, moving. That fun time when you try to plan ahead and account for all the "stuff" you've gathered/horded over the years since the last move.
The one thing I can say with 100% confidence is... I forgot how much "stuff" we've gathered since the last move. Let's see, looking back I seem to remember us as a family being a little on the "starting out" side. Morgan was maybe a year old and Zoe was about a month or two from being born. Ah yes, that accounts for about 70% of our newly gathered/horded "stuff".
It's interesting how we accumulate things over time. We accumulate things, some we need and some we don't. We accumulate relationships, some we think we need and others we think we could do without. What about the things that we accumulate internally or in our unconscious? Is it possible to inventory our unconscious? I'm not sure, that's why I am asking.
How do the things that live in our unconscious affect our day to day life? Just some thoughts I've been thinking about as of late.
Wow, it got all heavy in here all of a sudden.
So, we moved! We've still got things to put away and we've got things to gather!
Sunday, March 1, 2009
So, Here Goes
The Setup
A dear friend of mine and I were talking today while at a birthday party for my God-sons twin sons. During the course of our conversation he mentions to me that I should journal. I laugh of course because I know the flow of this endeavor. Usually starts with me getting inspired to write about something. Followed by me running out and spending $10/$2o on a new journal. After getting it home I enter the first entry, which is followed up by days of... well... intention. Intention to write, but with very little progress.
So, with that being said. I'm saving money this time and going "virtual" journal.
Lent
With today being the beginning of lent, I figured it a great time to start this journal. I can't say that I'll have a lot to say, but I'll sure try to capture what I can.
What is lent? Well, lent is actually this beautiful time in which we as followers of Christ prepare and journey with our Lord and Savior. This is only my third journey through lent (God willing not my last) and I can tell you that I am always surprised at how I am affected. I remember before our baptism and chrismation, my same dear friend gave me a bit of advice. We were discussing the difficulty of fasting, not only from certain foods, but with our whole being. Fasting with our eyes, our minds, our mouths... He said to me, "If you can't say no to a cheese-burger, what can you say no to?" So true.
Forgiveness
We attended forgiveness vespers tonight and it is the one time during the year when I actually get to see everyone in the parish face to face. There were so many new faces, some joyous, some scared, and some even smiling. Beautiful people beaming with intent. Intention like that in the face of a runner at the beginning of a race set on winning. Mind made up, no changing direction.
Humility
There is one man that I fully enjoy seeing every service. He's and older gentlemen who sometimes walks with a cane. He is humble in stature and joyous in his smiles. The light of Christ shines forth from this man like I've read only in the writings about saints. Thank God for you, servant of God.
Gratefulness
I am so very grateful for my best-friend and wife. She is patient and kind with me when I am not so patient and kind. My children who force me to be better. Last but not least, my spiritual father.
Glory to God in all things!
A dear friend of mine and I were talking today while at a birthday party for my God-sons twin sons. During the course of our conversation he mentions to me that I should journal. I laugh of course because I know the flow of this endeavor. Usually starts with me getting inspired to write about something. Followed by me running out and spending $10/$2o on a new journal. After getting it home I enter the first entry, which is followed up by days of... well... intention. Intention to write, but with very little progress.
So, with that being said. I'm saving money this time and going "virtual" journal.
LentWith today being the beginning of lent, I figured it a great time to start this journal. I can't say that I'll have a lot to say, but I'll sure try to capture what I can.
What is lent? Well, lent is actually this beautiful time in which we as followers of Christ prepare and journey with our Lord and Savior. This is only my third journey through lent (God willing not my last) and I can tell you that I am always surprised at how I am affected. I remember before our baptism and chrismation, my same dear friend gave me a bit of advice. We were discussing the difficulty of fasting, not only from certain foods, but with our whole being. Fasting with our eyes, our minds, our mouths... He said to me, "If you can't say no to a cheese-burger, what can you say no to?" So true.
Forgiveness
We attended forgiveness vespers tonight and it is the one time during the year when I actually get to see everyone in the parish face to face. There were so many new faces, some joyous, some scared, and some even smiling. Beautiful people beaming with intent. Intention like that in the face of a runner at the beginning of a race set on winning. Mind made up, no changing direction.
Humility
There is one man that I fully enjoy seeing every service. He's and older gentlemen who sometimes walks with a cane. He is humble in stature and joyous in his smiles. The light of Christ shines forth from this man like I've read only in the writings about saints. Thank God for you, servant of God.
Gratefulness
I am so very grateful for my best-friend and wife. She is patient and kind with me when I am not so patient and kind. My children who force me to be better. Last but not least, my spiritual father.
Glory to God in all things!
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